Oct 5, 2009
The HBO B-Movie
One rarely dissects the actual Hollywood movies that rotate through the non-primetime slots on HBO, a network known for its (former) monopoly on quality scripted television. Yet there is clearly some mad genius curator at the network who selects the movies designed to keep you engaged through cereal breaks. Case in point: I have seen Quiz Show seven times, and I don’t particularly like the movie. Yet the decent acting and manageable narrative hook me when I had a half-hour to kill (which regrettably becomes an hour and forty-five). While not all premium-channel movies achieve this alchemic ratio of cheap-to-acquire/likeable-enough, there is always one reappearing film that serves as oxygen to what must be an intimidatingly vast schedule to fill. We Own the Night is the current placeholder, checking all the boxes of an HBO B-movie: talented actors, a few engaging scenes, and very little else. A cynic assumes HBO is merely playing its part in a dying media cartel that needs to amortize its losses on decent films with unsatisfactory box office returns. But allow me pivot away from our hipstered-out “so bad it’s good” epoch and say it’s just as hard to identify a perfectly mediocre movie as it is a great one. Kudos to the man or woman at HBO charged with non-Emmy-eligible programming — you have entertained me more than I think you meant to. – Walter Haas



